Adults do very less exercise these days. Some people think that showing sporting events on the television such as Olympics and World Cup tournaments can be the best way to encourage adults to do exercise. Others believe there are other effective ways to do so. Discuss both views and state your opinion
Nowadays
grown
Verb problem
apply
ups
Correct your spelling
grown-ups
workout
less. It is considered by some people that the appropriate way to persuade Correct your spelling
work out
adults
to exercise
is by making them watch sports
like Olympics
and Correct article usage
the Olympics
World
Cup on TV, Correct article usage
the World
whereas
others think there are much better methods. In my opinion,I feel creating health
awareness to
the elderly and regular Change preposition
for
health
checkups motivates them to exercise
. On the one hand, watching their favourite player in a sport
event usually tends people to be more like them. In order to be physically fit like Change the noun form
sports
sports
celebrities one has to workout
. Correct your spelling
work out
In addition
to it,the adults
who were active in sports
years ago,
would feel motivated to play seeing some games. Remove the comma
apply
On the other hand
, there are yet
many other ways to encourage Rephrase
apply
adults
to exercise
. One way is to provide a health
awareness campaign for elderly people to keep them updated on the
Change the word
their
health
issues while
another method is my
conducting frequent Correct your spelling
by
health
checkups. Inorder
to stay healthy the Correct your spelling
In order
adults
will be motivated by themselves to exercise
without any external pressure. Finally
, in my opinion
I feel Add a comma
opinion,
self motivation
is the best way to encourage an adult to Add a hyphen
self-motivation
exercise
and stay fit. This
for some can be achieved by watching a sports
event while
for others it might be through monitoring their health
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite