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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

the pie chart below shows the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.

the pie chart below shows the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010.
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This
Linking Words
 pie chart provides information about the
merely
Change the adverb
mere
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 house
spendings
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spending
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 in a state between the year 1950 till 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, housing accounted
the
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for the
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 largest segment of the pie chart in 1950,
while
Linking Words
 healthcare contributed to
be
Wrong verb form
being
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 the least popular.
In contrast
Linking Words
, food contributed to
be
Wrong verb form
being
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 the
the
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apply
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most popular segment in the year 2010,
while
Linking Words
 transportation experienced a lower percentage. In 1950 housing contributed 72,1% of the total expenditures.
On
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In
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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second
Linking Words
 place was
the
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apply
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food, with a percentage of 11,2%. The average
spendings
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spending
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of
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on
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 education
was
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were
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 6,6%. The rest of the categories contributed between 4,4% and 2,4%. The largest
segmen
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segment
 in 2010 was food with a percentage of 34,0%.
Futrthermore
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Furthermore
,housing showed a number of 22,0%. Other and transportation were relatively the same, with 14,0% and 19,2%. The least spendings were on
the
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apply
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healthcare and education, with 4,5% and 6,3%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • household budget
  • economic development
  • lifestyle changes
  • inflation
  • cost of living
  • disposable income
  • necessities
  • luxury goods
  • percentage increase/decrease
  • financial priorities
  • consumer behavior
  • allocation of funds
  • fiscal habits
  • longitudinal comparison
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