Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour than for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements and this sets a bad example to the young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people

Mass media enabled inviting fame to those who have a commanding presence and dominant influence, best of whom are celebrities. People follow their

leads

Suggestion

lead

as their graceful lives set bars for glory, far less than their own achievements. As

this

needs imperative attention, I think it shall take a while for

this

concern to be addressed. Marked by their elusive beauties, celebrities hail in all forms of media;

thus

, people only see their outer sophistication.

Nonetheless

, their achievements are commonly left unnoticed.

This

is mainly due to idolatry where beauty is considered an investment.

Hence

, in today's era, a person need someone to look up to and is perfect enough to stand out among the rest.

This

notion is even exacerbated by the media, to which they preserve one's outer elements as priorities.

For instance

, adverts

hire celebrities

Accept comma addition

hire, celebrities

whose commanding influence hypnotises others to follow.

This

is quite hard to control since creativity is companies' best shot. Notwithstanding the attention that artists' glamour and richness are getting,

this

creates a notion

Suggestion

people's mind to achieve something rather than to stay mediocre and plebeian.

However

, the point of losing one’s sight towards achievements is getting into trouble.

This

create

Suggestion

creates

a bad impact to our society since people no longer feel the hunger to do the best in their own fields

instead

, they want to become gorgeous, rather than a winner, because it is perceived as a trend way more than the other. By and large, I think it has both positive and negative remarks. Albeit the fact that one is given more importance than the other, still, people consider a point of reference for standards. The drawbacks may outweigh the good points, I believe that general trends be acknowledged on their own.

Thu Feb 06 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

glamour
wealth
achievements
portrayed
overshadow
influenced
lifestyles
unrealistic
expectations
values
promoting
hard work
perseverance
inspire
positive impact

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Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour than for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements and this sets a bad example to the young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attraction. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

topics: We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

Nowadays, in many countries young people do not communicate with older people as much as they used to. Why is this happening? How could this situation be improved?

Some people think it is a good thing for senior managers to have much higher salaries than the other workers in a company. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home, leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages?