The charts show the sources of the electricity produced in 4 countries between 2003 and 2008.

The charts show the sources of the electricity produced in 4 countries between 2003 and 2008.
The pie charts give information about the production of
electricity
sources over the years between 2003 and 2005 in 4 different countries.
Overall
,
most
Correct article usage
the most
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common
electricity
sources are fossil fuel and
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
show examples
power
for Vietnam, India produced most of its
electricity
from fossil fuel,
for
Correct word choice
and for
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Morocco, the main
electricity
source was
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
show examples
power
. The majority of
power
Correct article usage
the power
show examples
supply
were
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was
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manufactured from
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
show examples
power
and nuclear
power
unlike
Add the comma(s)
,unlike
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other
counries
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countries
. Among for countries,
four fifths
Add a hyphen
four-fifths
show examples
of Indian
electricity
depended on fossil fuel,
while
this
source was the least common in
Sweden
and Morocco, which accounted
only
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for only
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4 and 5 per cent.
Hydro
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Hydropower
show examples
power
was mostly used in Morocco(95
per
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apply
show examples
cent),
Sweden
and Vietnam where about half of their
electricity
production was produced from
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
show examples
power
(
Sweden
52%, Vietnam 44%).
While
in India
hydro
Correct your spelling
hydropower
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power
was one of the rarely used
electricity
source
Change to a plural noun
sources
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compared to other countries. Nuclear
power
was the lion's share in
Sweden
where 44 per cent of
electricity
production was responsible
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
nuclear
power
, in India was the least one (4%)

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, hydro, power, sweden with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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