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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

in some contries, fast food restaurants and supermarkets give money to schools to promote their products. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#contries #food #restaurants #supermarkets #money #schools #products #development
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In Today's World we often see various new marketing schemes by big
food
 chains and enterprises. Promotion of their products in or around school premises is one of them. I think
this
 will have an ill effect on the children's health. Many Scientific studies have proved that these products in general are not healthy for the adolescents as their bodies tend to need more nutritional value for the growth.
these
Suggestion
These
food
 items
also
 contain a very high sugar content, whose consumption for longer periods leads to obesity and other health issues. Especially among teens,
Food
 Junking is one of the most addictive fads going around in today’s world.
Also
, the affordability of
such
 products is
also
 in question as all the parents cannot carry
this
 extra burden on their pockets on a regular basis.
for
Suggestion
For
 example, in countries like India, The Students tend to create pressure on parents for buying of
such
 items, which in turn makes the parenting more difficult as they start acting rebellious. It is extremely important for the development of healthy
food
 and lifestyle habits in children at an early stage for building a good society. In Sedentary
lifestyle
Accept comma addition
lifestyle, such
such
 as ours, these marketing gimmicks will harm the society and our future in the long run. To summarize, it is the moral responsibility of schools and parents together to not let the products endorsed by the
food
 chains or supermarkets
Inside
Suggestion
In
 or around the school premises and if promoted the
products
Suggestion
product
 needs to be safe and healthy for the children.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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