IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and up the world's fuel resources. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #air #travel #pollution #world #fuel #resources
this
Suggestion
This
argument it
Accept comma addition
argument, it
 totally deniable and it is
also
 not banned for
this
 kind of mocking reason. I
am completely disagree
Suggestion
completely disagree
am completely disagreeing
have completely disagreed
 with it.
because
Suggestion
Because
 some people said that
air
travel
 restricted for
pollution
.
but
Suggestion
But
, not only
air
travel
 which
use
Suggestion
uses
 the fossil
fuels bt
Accept comma addition
fuels, but
fuels but
also
 the other mode of
transportaion
a facility consisting of the means and equipment necessary for the movement of passengers or goods
transportation
 and industries are
also
 the serious problems to affect the
environment
 and create
pollution
 too.
firstly
Suggestion
Firstly
,
Accept space
,
we knew that the
environment
 damage
by
Suggestion
from
pollution
 and global warming.
in
Suggestion
With
In
 the lots of family, many relatives are outside their country for different purposes.
if
Suggestion
If
 the
air
travel
 will be banned
then
 what are the other transportations which help for them to meet
thier
of them or themselves
their
there
 family and for vacation?
Instead
 of
make
Suggestion
making
this
 silly causes to ban the
air
travel
, we reduce the other factors which will affect the
environment
 and
also
 to save the
environment
 like
burn
Suggestion
burning
 fossil fuels, less number of
vehicle
Suggestion
vehicles
 on the road and so on.
secondly
Suggestion
Secondly
, the
air
trsvel
change location; move, travel, or proceed, also metaphorically
travel
 is mainly
use
Suggestion
used
 as a
tourism
Suggestion
tourist
.
tourism
Suggestion
Tourism
 is the backbone of the country's economy.
people
Suggestion
People
generally goes
Suggestion
generally go
are generally going
 for their vacation with family and friends to enjoy the nature, culture
,
Accept space
,
 refreshment and a lot more.
Furthermore
,
trip
Suggestion
the trip
 is one of the top
priority
Suggestion
priorities
for
Suggestion
of
 the major people.
without
Suggestion
Without
 the
air
travel we
Accept comma addition
travel, we
 will not going to different countries for studying, business etc. To conclude, I
am not agree
Suggestion
don't agree
do not agree
 with
this
 argument that the
air
travel
 should be restricted for
pollution problem
Suggestion
pollution problems
the pollution problem
. Often, the industries and other transportation are as highly risky as
air
travel
 and for the
environment
 too.
so
to a very great extent or degree
So
 for
this
reasons
Suggestion
reason
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
am totally disagree
Suggestion
totally disagree
 with it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: