Some people think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of pre school age. Other working people think that family members such as grandparents will be better carers for their kids. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is no denying that nowadays, families
has been becoming
Suggestion
have been becoming
have become
short in comparison to
past especially
Accept comma addition
past, especially
in cities and there are many reasons behind
this
shift but
Accept comma addition
shift, but
these changes give birth to a contention that whether it is
positive or negative trend
Suggestion
a positive or negative trend
. As per my perspective, it has profound impact on the life of
multitude so
Accept comma addition
multitude, so
it is
negative trend
Suggestion
a negative trend
. To commence with, there are some reasons due to which most of the people like to live in nuclear families and predominant reason is that as inflation is increasing day by day so it becomes quite difficult for the individuals who live in urban areas to get better accommodation. Due to
this
, people tended to live in a house which is Very small because of
this
people
Suggestion
person
prefer to live in small families or sometimes alone so that they can fulfil all needs of their family members and live in
this
era of inflation. In my opinion, it has
adverse impact
Suggestion
an adverse impact
on the lives of individuals because of some reasons.
Firstly
, it
weaken
Suggestion
weakens
the bond of strong relationships as multitude live
alone so
Accept comma addition
alone, so
they don't spend quality time with their families. When individuals
lives
Suggestion
live
away from their house they may feel alone due to which they may become
victim
Suggestion
a victim
victims
of loneliness and homesickness. To recapitulate, inflation
has bring
Suggestion
has brought
major change
Suggestion
major changes
a major change
in the lifestyle of multitude which
effect
the conscious subjective aspect of feeling or emotion
affect
them mentally and physically.
Submitted by baongocbaongoc2010 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: