IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people prefer to do the same job their entire life rather than frequently changing jobs. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

A number of people would rather stay in
one
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job
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 rather than transferring from
one
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 place to another in their entire life. Security and comfort may contribute to the reason behind
this
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. In my opinion, I believe
this
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 is a positive development because it will enhance
one
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's skill and experience. A lot of people resist change,
therefore
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 they tend to stay loyal to the place they are working. Security may be a contributing factor and it provides comfort to them knowing that the longer they stay, the higher the indemnity they can claim once they reach the age of retirement. An example of
this
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 is the high percentage of nurses working in the ministry. The study shows that 60-70 percent of them are working more than 10 years,
moreover
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, they don't have plans of transferring to another field in the near future because they feel safe in the workplace they're working.
This
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 phenomenon has become a positive development because staying longer in
one
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job
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 would result in more skills and experience to every worker.
In addition
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 to that,
this
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 would give them an edge for promotion to a higher position in the future whenever the company would hire new vacancy for senior positions. In conclusion, staying in
one
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job
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 provides stability for every individual.
This
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 can result in a positive outcome because it enhances not just the skills but as well as the experiences of each worker that would eventually secure their future in the company.
Furthermore
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, being loyal to a
job
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 that you love, would provide comfort to oneself knowing that you love what you're doing.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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