Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children

In the contemporary world, it is common belief that participate in an unpaid

community

service

program would be mandatory for greater outcomes in many aspects of humanity.

Although

, it is important to some parents would not agree to

this

because, they do not want their children to go out and clean the city at their younger age,

personally

Suggestion

personality

, I strongly believe that parents should encourage their children to do free

community

work for a society. In the following essay, I will discuss

this

issue using some example to support my views and demonstrates points.

However

, the unpaid

community

service

should compulsory to high

school

programmes have their own positive and negative sides and in following essay we will discuss them in detail.

First

of all, convincing argument can be that helping society with unpaid

community

service

is a good initiate to have a brighter future.

To begin

with, children should have taught to collect a donation for physically disabled people without any personal profit.

In other words

, if children learn to donate

money

for a good cause at

school

level,

then

it would be good help for the people who are handicapped;

therefore

, the same message they convey to their parents or friends and so that they will do the same. The

second

reason for my belief is that improving the neighbourhood.

For instance

, children should have taught to clean their society by keeping the garbage in the garbage bag, do not throw the garbage outside in a public place;

as a result

, there would be lesser disease and healthier life that would be beneficial for them.

Additionally

, teach sports to younger children is a good way to help each other who do not know how to play that any particular sport.

For example

, sometimes younger people feels hard to play some sports, but if they get a guidance from any other who is good at

this

then

that would be helpful for them. If these scenarios have merit,

then

conclusion

Suggestion

the conclusion

conclusions

drawn in the original argument is significantly strengthened.

On the other hand

, some arguments can be made that teaching

school

children collect

money

for a donation would result harmful. The main reason for

this

is if one child collects more

money

than

other

any of various alternatives; some other

another

then

they might feel sad while other might make misuse of

money

they collected.

However

, closer examination would reveal that if the collection of

money

by children is monitored by their parent or teacher

then

there would be less or almost no chance of misuse of

money

. Apart from

this

further

analysis would make it clear that collecting

money

for a good cause is always a good step toward strong humanity. To sum up,

although

there are some benefits of not having

compulsion

Suggestion

a compulsion

the compulsion

to unpaid

community

service

at high

school

programme, the advantages of having a compulsion to do unpaid

community

work surely outweigh its disadvantage. Having considered all the arguments above, I would concede that teaching children at

school

level for helping others for free would always be a good habit.

Sun Feb 09 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

506 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

compulsory
high school programmes
unpaid community service
charity
improving the neighbourhood
teaching sports
sense of responsibility
empathy
broader perspective
societal issues
college applications
job applications
positive impact

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