Some parents believe that cell phones are harmful to children, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With
Suggestion
To
increase in technology newer phones are getting available
for
Suggestion
from
in
all the corners of the world. With all the inventions there are critiques who only see the downsides of the products like the parents who perceive that smart phones can cause only harm to their offsprings, while there are others who rightly believe these devices can help their children learn and grow.
To begin
Linking Words
with, there are people who choose to see the downsides with the children using their smartphones, they say children get addicted to games on their phones that they spend so much time on it and get so immersed and forget the outside world exists. Which somehow makes them inadequate to handle social situations in real life.
Also
Linking Words
the health problems one gets with all the radio and magnetic waves being absorbed constantly. On the other end, we have people who consider the safety approvals for those phones to be available in the
first
Linking Words
place, they argue that the government would not allow them to be sold if they did any harm physically to their offsprings.
Linking Words
Also they
Accept comma addition
Also, they
believe that their children can adapt to the changing world faster if they had the access to these devices, since they do learn quicker online. Which they believe to be much more useful than the actual
class room
a room in a school where lessons take place
classroom
training itself. They can interact with others more easily on the go and make friends before they even meet in real life. To conclude, there are disadvantages of
having children use
Suggestion
will children use
are children using
were children using
having children use
smartphones, but they are not as harmful as some people tend to believe. There are
health guidelines
Suggestion
the health guidelines
that a company has to follow before producing and selling any of their devices,
also
Linking Words
parents do have the access to their children’s usage which outweigh any of the disadvantage.
Submitted by shanshai746 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: