IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Nowadays in many countries, people are following the latest fashion, hairstyle and so on.what is influenced this? Is it a positive or a negative development.

#countries #people #fashion #hairstyle #development
Fashion
 trends
has always been evolving
Suggestion
have always been evolving
. The only difference is that now, people have access to the internet to see what's hot and what's not. It is in our nature to want to fit in,
therefore
, we try to follow whatever famous
fashion
 trend there is at the moment even if it doesn'
t
 fit us. For me,
this
 is a negative development as it takes away one's personality and uniqueness. Because people
wants
Suggestion
want
 to blend in, their own persona has been lost in following these trends. Most of us wants to be accepted by the society that if there are trends to follow we tend to go with the flow in
expense
Suggestion
the expense
 of our nature. We see celebrities and the so called
influencers
 trying a certain product, believing everything they say about it and think, I need that, but in actuality, it doesn'
t
 suit you or your skin type. Most of these people we see promoting skin care products are bogus because they don'
t
 really try the product,
instead
 they go to a certified dermatologist to take care of their skin. In the same vein, celebrities who show up with the latest
fashion
 trends aren'
t
 really
fashion
savvy but
Accept comma addition
savvy, but
 rather they have their own stylists to dress them up and make them look good. Most of them
also
 just have the confidence along with the clothes they wear to make them stand out. In conclusion, following
fashion
 trends
develops
Suggestion
develop
an
Suggestion
a
 negative impression
to
Suggestion
of
 a person as it changes the way they look at themselves.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Social Media
  • Celebrities
  • Influencers
  • Peer Pressure
  • Social Acceptance
  • Disposable Income
  • Self-esteem
  • Confidence
  • Marketing Campaigns
  • Consumer Behavior
  • Fast Fashion
  • Sustainable Fashion
  • Self-expression
  • Cultural Identity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: