22. Successful sports professional can earn a great deal of money than people in other important profession. Some people think it is fully justify. Other think it is unfair. Discuss both views. Give your own opinion. Include relevant example from your own knowledge.

It is the fact that famous sport players are paid with extremely high salary worldwide. Some people support

this

; while, others believe it is unfair for other professionals in our societies. I personally agree with the former. The essay will discuss both views and presents my own opinion.

To begin

with,

firstly

, sport celebrities should be paid with huge salary because it takes a long journey for them to become famous globally. The majority of them start their training in their early childhood and left their families behind them. They went through the tough process which ordinary citizens are unable to tolerate.

Secondly

, they convey the optimistic spirit, become role models and take leadership responsibilities in our communities.

Last

but not the least, they are hired by magnates which make extremely large profit from sports events;

therefore

, they should be rewarded well as well.

However

, others believe that sports celebrities should not be pain

such

a huge amount of money for their jobs.

Firstly

, they believe that sports professionals only provide entertainment to our lives. The role of

this

professional in our societies may not be necessary as compared with other professionals,

such

as nurses, teachers, policemen, and so on. Without the latter's contribution, our societies won't function properly and won't provide harmonious living environments for citizens.

Therefore

, they may advocate that the latter occupations should deserve high payment. In my opinion, I support that it is fair for famous sports players to receive extremely high salaries because the above reasons.

For example

, renowned retired Olympic athlete, Jingjing Guo, has become a significant character in China because she becomes the icon for many Chinese females and encourage them to pursue their dreams in the reality.

Therefore

, it is fair for her to make huge profit when she are invited to play in some commercial advertisements.

Submitted by busybee1693 on Mon Feb 10 2020

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

305 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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22. Successful sports professional can earn a great deal of money than people in other important profession. Some people think it is fully justify. Other think it is unfair. Discuss both views. Give your own opinion. Include relevant example from your own knowledge.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Multinational companies are becoming increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Some believe children should be taught to give speeches and presentations in school. Why is this? What other skills do you think it is important to be taught in schools?

Some people believe that there are many reasons that can motivate a person to keep working for the same company whereas others say that money is the main reason. Do you agree or disagree

When designing buildings people should consider the intended use rather than appearance. Do you agree or disagree?

Living in a country where you have to speak in a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?