One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy

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Today, advanced medical services which

are providing

Suggestion

are provided

by the hospitals allowing people

stay

Suggestion

to stay

healthy and live longer. In my opinion,

this

Linking Words

trend has more positive effect on people's lifestyle and the positive sides always exceeded rather than drawbacks. It is believed that after the developing various medical equipments produced

with

Suggestion

the new technology, many

diceases

an impairment of health or a condition of abnormal functioning

diseases

dioceses

is treated

Suggestion

are treated

and

this

Linking Words

change leads people to be healthy and happy in their life.

For example

Linking Words

, around 20 years ago in my city, there was not any

tomography which

Accept comma addition

tomography, which

can check internal diseases of people and as consequences, many citizens died from the

undiagnosed

Suggestion

illness. After

purchuasing

the act of buying

purchasing

this

Linking Words

equipment, many people could cure their illness.

Moreover

Linking Words

, living

long live

Suggestion

a long life

long life

and to be

healty

having or indicating good health in body or mind; free from infirmity or disease

healthy

are

Suggestion

one of the main aims of human-being. Since, human resources are considered to be the most essential in

this

Linking Words

world. It is proved by many demographics materials that life-expectancy in many countries is increasing thanks to the good condition of hospitals and professional doctors and modern medical equipments. Overall, modern medical facilities already provided more opportunities and result of them people could conquer many diseases and have

chance

Suggestion

a chance

the chance

to live longer and healthy.

Tue Feb 11 2020

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

193 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

consequences
improved medical care
life expectancy
advantages
disadvantages
healthcare
quality of life
population
economic burden
elderly
dependency
technology
ethical concerns

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One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

In the future all cars, busses and trucks will be driveless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years.Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

n many countries, people like to eat a wider variety of food than can be grown in their local area. As a result, much of the food people eat today has to come from other regions. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh disadvantages?