Nowadays more and more older people who are looking for work have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problem does this cause? What are some possible solutions?

As in
this
fast
world everybody
Accept comma addition
world, everybody
is facing challenges and problem throughout his life and one of the
problem
Suggestion
problems
for both senior citizens and youth of
this
country is that they are competing with each other for the same
job
. So in
this
essay
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
will talk about the
affects
property of a personal character that is portable but not used in business
effects
and
solution
Suggestion
the solution
of
this
. To embark
,
Accept space
,
due to the increasing
population everybody
Accept comma addition
population, everybody
is facing
challenges especially
Accept comma addition
challenges, especially
in the field of
job
where competition between two distinct
age
groups evolve the lots of problems
for
instance as
Accept comma addition
instance, as
due to
high number
Suggestion
the high number
of applicants most of the deserving
peoples
Suggestion
people
didn't get
job
Suggestion
the job
a job
jobs
. Which leads to depression or some of the people get mentally disturbed. Delving
further
,
Accept space
,
as per the above mentioned points it may be harmful for our upcoming generation to survive in
this
world
.
Accept space
.
To tackle
this
problem
goverment
the organization that is the governing authority of a political unit
government
must put a criteria of
age
for
Suggestion
in
both these
age
group peoples for a particular
job
so that no one left in
this
race
.
Accept space
.
Next thing
Suggestion
The next thing
to be done is to put a retirement
age
for
elder ones
Suggestion
the elder ones
with a good amount of pension by which competition between them
automatically get
Suggestion
automatically gets
decline and every person gets his
job
that he/ she want.
Collectively i
Accept comma addition
Collectively, I
Collectively I
want to say both
group
Suggestion
groups
of peoples have
thier
of them or themselves
their
own needs which can be
fulfill
completed to perfection
fulfilled
through
job
Suggestion
the job
so from my point of view government must pay close attention
toward
Suggestion
to
these
aspect
Suggestion
aspects
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: