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Band 2.5

many museum charge for admission while other are free. do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museum outweigh the disadvantages?

#museum #charge #admission #people
The
museum
 is unique places where you get to experience the history from past to the latest technology.
however admsion
Accept comma addition
However, admission
however admission
However admission
however admissions
However admsion
 is required when entering.
Museum
Suggestion
The museum
 is the popular places to go to an a weekends with family or friend.
admission
Suggestion
Admission
 is one of the funds which keeps the
museum
 running and
also
 to maintain its exhibits. Without
admission
 museums would be dirty, poorly maintained, and likely impossible to operate, unless funded from government or charity.
however
Accept comma addition
However, admission
However admission
admission
 is the thing which may keep the customer from entering. Usually we have to pay around $30 for
admission
. Children or family, which does not earn much simply cannot afford with
such
 amount. They will go to
museum which
Suggestion
the museum, which
the museum which
a museum which
 is free or even not go and experience the greatness of
museum
Suggestion
the museum
, which
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 think is horrible because it should open for everyone. I think having an
admission
 is a disadvantage since
museum
 should be open for everyone, but
admission
 is essential for running the
museum
. So, I think it is very important to come up with a plan so that
museum
Suggestion
the museum
 could be operated but
also
 be
admission
Suggestion
admitted
 free,
such
 as government funding or doing a charity. Auckland
museum
 is one great example. It is one of the biggest
museum
Suggestion
museums
 in Newzealand but it is
also
 free of
admission
 since it's government funded.
Submitted by mnq058 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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