IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the top ten countries with the highest spending on travel in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The chart below shows the top ten countries with the highest spending on travel in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#ten #countries #travel #summarise #information #features #comparisons
GRAPHICS in
THIS
 TEST SHOW us THE TOP TEN
COUNTRIES
 WITH THE HIGHEST ALLOCATE ON TRAVEL IN 2014. THE display of EXPENDITURE IS BASED ON THE CALCULATION OF US $
TONS
.
COUNTRIES
 calculation CONTAINS
CHINA
 (People's REPUBLIC OF
CHINA
/PRC), the UNITED STATES, GERMANY, the UNITED KINGDOM, SINGAPORE, SOUTH KOREA, HONG KONG, INDIA, MALAYSIA, TAIWAN (
GOVERNMENT
 OF
CHINA
/ ROC).
GRAPH
 IS USED MULTIPLE OF 20 SCALES WHICH STARTS FROM 0 TO 120. THE
GRAPH
 SHOWED WITH A HORIZONTAL DISPLAY WHICH IS ACCOMPANIED by THE SEPARATOR LINE IN THE SCALE WITH VALUE 4.
THIS
GRAPH
 WAS RELATED TO THE SOURCE FROM UNWTO
COUNTRIES
 WITH THE HIGHEST
COSTUMER
Correct your spelling
CUSTOMER
show examples
CONSUME
Replace the word
CONSUMPTION
show examples
 ON TRAVEL
2014
Change preposition
IN 2014
show examples
 FALL INTO
CHINA
. The number one COUNTRY WITH CONCENTRATE 110 US $Billion.
Next
 RATED ACCORDED TO THE UNITED STATES AND GERMANY WITH 85 US $
tons
, and
also
 followed by the UNITED KINGDOM WITH 55 US $
tons
, SOUTH KOREA AND HONG KONG WITH 20 US $Billion, INDIA WITH 15 US $
tons
,
then
 MALAYSIA WITH 12 US $
tons
. The
LAST
 RATED in
graphic
Correct article usage
the graphic
show examples
 showed by the country
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
GOVERNMENT
 OF
CHINA
 WITH 10 US $
tons
 consumed. COMPARISON OF DONATE shopper ON TRAVEL
CHINA
 WITH
GOVERNMENT
 OF
CHINA
 CONTAINED 100 US $
tons
. As the
graph
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 the customer
EXPEND
Replace the word
expenses
show examples
ON
Change preposition
in
show examples
CHINA
IS
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 11 TIMES LARGER THAN
GOVERNMENT
 OF
CHINA
. THERE ARE 2 STATE
COUNTRIES
 THAT HAVE THE EQUATION OF SPENDING COSTUMERS each other. Some
COUNTRIES
 IN ASIA
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 telling us to CONTINUE and DOMINATE the
ALLOCATE
Replace the word
allocated
show examples
 purchaser COMPARED TO OTHER continents. THE
CHINA
 COUNTRY BECOMES THE BIGGEST SPENDING customer IN 2014.
CHINA
Change noun form
CHINA'S
show examples
 NEIGHBOURING
COUNTRIES
, HONG KONG AND
DEMOCRACY
Correct article usage
THE DEMOCRACY
show examples
 OF
CHINA
 (TAIWAN) ARE INCLUDED IN
LIST
Correct article usage
THE LIST
show examples
. THAT
ALSO
Add a missing verb
IS ALSO
show examples
 RELATED TO
NUMBER
Correct article usage
THE NUMBER
show examples
 OF POPULATIONS WHERE THERE ARE POTENTIALS FOR VERY BIG TRAVELS.
Submitted by agus.adi.sumerta7 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, tons, china, government, graph with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "go" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: