2- Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #sports #stars #development

In the world a large number of sport stars

are attracted

Suggestion

are attracting

have attracted

attract

attention to themselves, some teenagers applaud and follow them in media and social networks. I believe

this

trend vary

person

and has beneficial and non-beneficial effects on children and societies. On the one hand, many adolescents who are sportsmen or sportswomen’ fans have neglected personal traits them, their

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

modeled

resembling sculpture

modelled

. For many years

famous sports

Suggestion

a famous sports person

famous sports people

person

has been exercising

Suggestion

exercised

and achieved success. They must have discipline on their

work out

the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit

workout

and join a sports club and professional trainer train them. In a major or international match or Olympic, they suffer stress and some have taken performance enhancing drugs or acting dishonestly to get the result

them

people in general

they

want.

Thus

, these are against the spirit of the game and gives the game a bad reputation. In

this

situation, idolizing sports stars have dangerous impacts on young people.

However

, I contend

this

tendency could be helpful if only the teenagers ignored the negative and focus on the positive shape of athlete’s lives. Many Sports

person

Suggestion

people

persons

who can be good for ethical patterns and offer a moral lesson for teenagers to follow.

For example

, Muhammad Ali clay was an American professional boxer, activist, and philanthropist. His actions as a conscientious objector

Suggestion

the war made him an icon for the larger counterculture generation, and he was a high-profile figure of racial pride for African-Americans during the civil rights movement. In conclusion, the talent and achievement of sports celebrities could stimulate youngsters to improve their potential

abilities but

Accept comma addition

abilities, but

their bad

behavior

manner of acting or controlling yourself

behaviour

could have negative impacts on them.

Mon Feb 24 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

admire
role model
excellence
hard work
dedication
cheating
misconduct
critical evaluation
guidance
positive influence
negative influence
inspiration

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2- Nowadays, young people admire sports stars though they often do not set a good example. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

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