IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that human needs for farmland, housing and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals. Do you agree or disagree with this point of view?

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The bar graph shows the types of addiction and their amount per
week
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 by some specific families with
further
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 classification by the number of dinners that families have together per
week
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. Overall, it can be seen that families with less dinners together
use
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 more substances, while families who spend more time eating dinners together consume less poisonous substances. Looking into the detail, 33% of families who eat 0-2 dinners per
week
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use
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 alcohol, 21%
use
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marijuana
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 and 15%
use
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 tobacco.
On the other hand
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, families who eat 5-7 dinners per
week
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 consume a half quantity of alcohol (15%), a quarter of tobacco (4%) and almost one
third
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 of
marijuana
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 (8%) than families who eat 0-2 dinners together per
week
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. 43% of families that eat every
week
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 0-2 together have friends who drink regularly, while 33% have friends who
use
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marijuana
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 regularly. 29% of families that eat 5-7 dinners together per
week
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 have friends who drink regularly, whereas 18% have friends who
use
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marijuana
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 regularly. 15% of families who eat 0-2 dinners together per
week
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 would like to try drugs in the future, while only 4% of families who eat 5-7 dinners per
week
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 are interested in trying drugs in the future.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • food security
  • malnutrition
  • urban development
  • quality of life
  • social stability
  • economic development
  • infrastructure
  • living standards
  • moral responsibility
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem balance
  • environmental degradation
  • climate regulation
  • ecological balance
  • sustainable development
  • compromise
  • natural habitats
  • endangered species
  • medical discoveries
What to do next:
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