IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Media should show more educational programs than films. Do you agree ordisagree?

#media #show #programs #films #ordisagree
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One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is that
entertained
Replace the word
entertainment
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 programs presented On TV
is
Change the verb form
are
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 a waste of time
known
Correct word choice
and known
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 for
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 irrelevant or occasionally destructive effects
While
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 should provide people with more gainful knowledge. Personally, I tend to Consider that
this
Linking Words
 point of view is well grounded,
however
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 some, we Should not ignore the fact that most of us still feel the demand for entertainment. First and foremost, it is well-known that /it is highly recommended by
the
Correct article usage
apply
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scientists that Increasing the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
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 of scientific reports
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 much more
advantages
Replace the word
advantageous
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 rather than Transmitting
the
Correct article usage
apply
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trivial movies on TV. One of the main reasons behind that it
does
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not Only
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
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 the opportunity of broadening
horizon
Correct article usage
the horizon
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, for each viewer
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 but
also
Linking Words
 leads to the Literal thinking
as well as
Linking Words
 which can easily afford assimilating knowledge. A case in
The
Correct article usage
apply
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point is National Geography which
enables
Verb problem
provides
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 people with the opportunity
of being
Change preposition
to be
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Informed about wildlife and environmental issues.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is more
advantages
Replace the word
advantageous
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 to Choose well-organized programs than useless films.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it can
also
Linking Words
 be argued that having transmitted the movies on Television can assist the viewers to take some entertainment forgetting
a
Fix the infinitive
to a
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rid of stress For a few hours after their highly pressured jobs.
That is
Linking Words
 to say, there are some Profitable broadcasts
during
Change preposition
while
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 watching films which attract people on the positive side. Take
Linking Words
for
Add the comma(s)
, for
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 example,
Ellen
Change noun form
Ellen's
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 show, which always intends to share new jests with us
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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to Make the viewers more glad in their leisure. In conclusion, taking everything mentioned into account in our final analysis we can Say that showing numerous contents
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 pros and cons, but
Linking Words
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
contributing
Change preposition
to
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Two educational programs can lead to analytical improvement of one’s mindset in life.
Submitted by xackerjonxackerjon on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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