Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

To begin

Linking Words

with, organised

group

Use synonyms

activities allow children to socialize with people in their immediate vicinity. Children learn to interact with the people in their society. To illustrate

this

Linking Words

, one can organise

picnic

Suggestion

picnics

among

familieswhich

Suggestion

families which

will give enough room for children to socialize.

Additionally

Linking Words

, children learn various team building activities like working in a

group

Use synonyms

competing with their peers, coping up with pressure etc.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, children learn the right attitude from being in a

group

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, children should be independent in choosing their activities in their free time.

This

Linking Words

gives the freedom of thought and children learn to take up challenges and responsibilities.

However

Linking Words

, there is a possibility that certain children take up wrong routes. Due to technological advancements, children are more prone to playing video games, socializing themselves on the internet.

This

Linking Words

will detach them from their immediate social circle. Children can be given freedom of thought, but adult supervision is necessary to ensure that they do not take

wrong path

Suggestion

the wrong path

a wrong path

. In conclusion, having considered both the views, I think an organised

group

Use synonyms

activity is more beneficial for children. Children are the future of society and their nurturing can not be ignored.

Submitted by khalighi.amir89 on Tue Feb 25 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

196 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
occupied
organized
group activities
benefits
social
teamwork skills
interpersonal skills
friendship
discipline
time management
interests
hobbies
independent play
creativity
problem-solving skills
self-reliance
explore
discover

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

<4
band
The scheme below represents the process of brick manufacturing for the building industry.
The scheme below represents the process of brick manufacturing industry.
5
band
Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?
Nowadays, there are fewer people writing by hand. This writer argues that there are important reasons that related to the improvement of technology, and in my viewpoint these have been largely negative trend as it prevents the development of children when they just started to know writing.
6
band
Research has shown that spending less time in the office can reduce the use of energy (for example, electricity, gas). Thus some companies close for some days a week. Do this advantage of this development outhweight the disadvantage
Studies have shown that minimizing time spent in the office can reduce the use of energy, such as electricity and gas. Hence, why some companies close on certain days of the week. Nonetheless, I believe that this practice is more beneficial to the company, for the reasons stated below.
6
band
in many countruies, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?
Nowadays, the crime rate shows an increasing number in many countries. This condition is usually caused by two main factors which are unemployment and poverty. The government should take some actions to provide job opportunities for the citizens, to improve and change their life standards in order to reduce the crime rates.
7.5
band
It is commonly believed that some people are with certain talents for instance for sport and music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sport person or musician. Discuss both views and give tour opinion.
Unhealthy foods and drinks that contain a lot of sugar pose major health risks for people. Therefore, the prices of those products should be increased. I disagree with this view because making healthy foods more affordable and launching health campaigns are the most effective methods to counteract these risks.

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Fully explain your ideas

The scheme below represents the process of brick manufacturing for the building industry.

Fewer and fewer people today write by hand using a pen, pencil or brush. What are the reasons for this? Is the decline in writing by hand a positive or negative development?

Research has shown that spending less time in the office can reduce the use of energy (for example, electricity, gas). Thus some companies close for some days a week. Do this advantage of this development outhweight the disadvantage

in many countruies, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

It is commonly believed that some people are with certain talents for instance for sport and music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sport person or musician. Discuss both views and give tour opinion.