IELTS Academic Writing Task 1/ Graph Writing - Bar Chart: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart below shows the top ten countries with the highest spending on travel in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

IELTS Academic Writing Task 1/ Graph Writing - Bar Chart:

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

The chart below shows the top ten countries with the highest spending on travel in 2014.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

You should write at least 150 words.
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Graphics In
This
Test Introduce The Reader About The Top Ten
Countries
With The Highest Allocation On Travel In 2014. The Top Ten
Countries
Were Displaying The Reader As Concern Expenditure Based On The Calculation Of Us $
Tons
.
Countries
From The Information Chart Contains The Well Known
Countries
,
Such
As
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
China
, The United States, Germany, The United Kingdom, Singapore, South Korea, Hong Kong, India, Malaysia, And
Taiwan
. The Information From Chart Was Using Multiple Of 20 Scales Which Starts From 0 To 120.
Then
The Graph Was Showed With
Horizontal
Correct article usage
a Horizontal
show examples
Display Which Is Accompanied By The Separator Line In The Scale With Value 4.
This
Was Related To The Source From Unwto
Overall
,
The
Correct article usage
apply
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China
Spent More Money On Consumer Travel Than
Other
Correct article usage
the Other
show examples
9 (Nine)
Countries
In 2014.
China
Spent Money On Travel With Concentrate 110 Us $
Tons
.
Next
Rated Accorded To The United States And Germany With 85 Us $
Tons
, And
Also
Followed By The United Kingdom With 55 Us $
Tons
, South Korea And Hong Kong With 20 Us $
Tons
, India With 15 Us $
Tons
,
Then
Malaysia With 12 Us $
Tons
. The
Last
Rated In Graphic Showed By The Country Of
Taiwan
With 10 Us $
Tons
Consumed In 2014 In Terms Of Comparison of Donation Consumer On
China
With
Taiwan
Were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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Contained 100 Us $
Tons
. As The Chart Show The Purchaser Expended
On
Change preposition
In
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China
Is 11 Times Larger Than
Taiwan
Change preposition
in Taiwan
show examples
. The Another Fact That Reader Can
Took
Change the verb form
Take
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From The Graph Was From Top To Bottom,
Units
Correct article usage
the Units
show examples
Of Spending Was Decreasing From One To Another. There Are 2 (Two)
Countries
That Have The Equalization Of Spending Costumers Each Other. Some
Countries
In Asia Was Telling Us To Continue And Dominate Compared To Other Continents In Years Of 2014. The Conclusion From The Diagram Was Telling Us About Money Spent On Tour 2014. We
Have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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Known The
People
Change noun form
People's
show examples
Republic Of
China
Becomes The Biggest Spending Patron In 2014.
China
Change noun form
China's
show examples
Neighbouring
Countries
, Hong Kong And
Taiwan
Are Included. That
Also
Add a missing verb
is Also
show examples
Related To
Number
Correct article usage
the Number
show examples
Of Populations Where There Are Potentials For Very Big Travels
Submitted by agus.adi.sumerta7 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, tons, china, taiwan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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