IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As cities expanding, some people claim governments should look forward creating better networks of public transportation available for everyone rather than building more roads for vehicle owning population. What’s your opinion? Give some examples or experience to support.

In
this
Linking Words
 modern era, there is an ongoing deliberation among people on the correlation between public and private transit
facilities
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 some people believe that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should focus on creating better connectivity for public transportation
instead
Linking Words
 of giving priority to facilitate private roads, the other school of thought does not agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 it. I firmly believe that
regime
Correct article usage
the regime
show examples
 should give
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
attention to the public
commute
Check wording
transport
show examples
facilities
Use synonyms
. There are tremendous advantages of expanding public
related
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
transport
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as metro
train
Fix the agreement mistake
trains
show examples
 and
bus
Fix the agreement mistake
buses
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it will help cities and countries to reduce the traffic jam problems
happening
Wrong verb form
that happen
show examples
 during
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
working hours.
Secondly
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 an
environment
Replace the word
environmentally
show examples
 friendly approach as it will save fuel consumption
Change preposition
to at
show examples
at
Use the right word
a
show examples
 drastic level.
Moreover
Linking Words
, one can save a good amount of money by cutting down the travelling budget
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every month by adopting
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
civil
transport
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, investing
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 roads just for a private vehicle owner cannot be
much
Rephrase
very
show examples
 fruitful until those
facilities
Use synonyms
 can be consumed by the city
transport
Use synonyms
 authorities. In fact, the expansion of
such
Linking Words
 highways and roads will introduce more toll taxes and other expenses to car and truck owners.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the municipality
requires
Wrong verb form
is required
show examples
 to take care of
such
Linking Words
 roadways and highways by giving
massive
Punctuation problem
massive,
show examples
 expensive contracts to the maintenance companies. A classic example would be an express highway about 100 miles to
connect
Wrong verb form
connecting
show examples
 two cities
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
 a huge amount of dollars to maintain the road for many years. In conclusion, the advantages of increasing
connectivity
Correct article usage
the connectivity
show examples
 of public
transport
Use synonyms
 apparently outweigh the drawbacks.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is an irrefutable fact that
transport
Use synonyms
 authorities should pay attention and
avail
Verb problem
provide
show examples
 more and more
public level
Use the right word
public-level
show examples
 commute options.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to clearly state your opinion in the introduction.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use more linking words to connect your ideas.
Task Achievement
Provide more detailed examples to support your points.
Content
You clearly stated your preference for public transportation.
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