IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Museums and art galleries should concentrate on works that show history and culture of their own country rather than works of the other parts in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#museums #art #galleries #works #show #history #culture #country #parts #world
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
For a long time, museums have played a major role in preserving materials of historical importance. Some people hold the view that it should only exhibit objects, which belong to its country
instead
Linking Words
 of others. Personally, I fairly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 idea for a number of reasons. On the one hand, people believe local artefacts should be given priority for some particular purposes. The
first
Linking Words
 one is local museum should be a place which honours and conveys historical values of the land where it is located. The artefacts it conversed could represent an ancient period of regional history, which could increase patriotism in the locals’ mind.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it is essential for indigenous people to have an insight into their own history and heritage before learning the others.
In addition
Linking Words
 to
this
Linking Words
, for travellers, they go to the museum in order to have a glimpse of the cultures, traditions and history of the nation it belongs.
For instance
Linking Words
, it would be a disappointment if they go to Vietnam, but see more works from abroad than local antiques.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 some people are against
this
Linking Words
 idea, I am of the view that displaying international works of art has one main merit. It is that it helps diversify the content of the museums and galleries.
This
Linking Words
 would give residents and visitors a chance to enrich their understanding about artworks, and
therefore
Linking Words
, could broaden their horizon of the world from historical and cultural aspects. In conclusion, my view is that the ultimate goal of museums and galleries is to spread knowledge of all kinds,
nevertheless
Linking Words
 museums and art galleries should make masterpieces of their own country more dominant than the works of the other parts of the world.
Submitted by nguyenmylinh6197 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: