Today more people are overweight than ever before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this epidemic?

#people #effects #epidemic

Nowadays, the number of overweight people

dramatically increase

Suggestion

dramatically increases

than ever before.

This

essay will discuss several primary causes of

this

epidemic,

then

examine the main effects of

this

problem. There are many reasons suggest why

number

Suggestion

the number

of overweight people enlarge noticeably in modern work. In my perspective, two primary causes of

this

epidemic

Suggestion

are

inactive lifestyle and detrimental diet, which are common in

today adults

Suggestion

adults today

Firstly

, people seem to prefer cars and elevator

instead

of walking or stair and tend to have less physical demands in

office

Suggestion

the office

This

unhealthy habits result in burning less calories and gaining weight.

Secondly

, young people are having a disordered, unbalanced diet and consume a large proportion of fast food these days.

For instance

, approximately 90% obese adults in the world admit that they usually ingest high-calories and fast food.

As a result

, overweight

consequently

leads to concerning issues

such

as health problems and loss of productivity. Consuming too much calories without burning them

incorrecting

Suggestion

in correcting

function of our body,

then

worsen them. Whenever our digestion system

worsen

Suggestion

worsens

by fat increase, it is often results in risks and illness.

Furthermore

, overweight

also activate

Suggestion

also activates

loss of productivity. A research pointed out that obese people often have to face with uncomfortable body, stress, tiredness and mental health problem.

This

causes

reducing

Suggestion

reduced

working

Suggestion

work

capacity, making people less productive.

For instance

, overweight people

also

have to put more effort than ordinary people in working. In conclusion, more and more people become overweight and obese in recent years because

of inactive lifestyle

Suggestion

of an inactive lifestyle

and unhealthy diet.

As a result

, it is common that overweight leads to serious health problems and loss of productivity.

Submitted by linhlemyhuynh on Fri Feb 28 2020

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

271 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today more people are overweight than ever before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this epidemic?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. dinosaur, dodos …). There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. Do you agree or disagree?

People naturally resist making changes in their lives. What kind of problems of problems can this cause? Whats solutions you can suggest?

in many countries today, parents are able to choose to send their children to single sex schools or co-educational schools. Some people think that children going to single sex schools have disadvantages later in life. To what extent do you agree?

Some people think that the main purpose of schools is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to be benefit them at individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree.