Government should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

In modern's time, there are two different opinions, one of which is that the government should spend amounts of budget in education for students and teenagers, the other which is that constructing of entertainment building is more worthwhile than anything. But I personally believe that if the authority
makes the
Accept comma addition
makes, the
more sport centres, the more citizens can feel
satisfying
Suggestion
satisfied
In the
first
place, nowadays, it is easy to find on broadcast via the Internet or television that a lot of elderly and 20's to 40's people have complained that there is not enough place where people can unwind their stress or tiredness. According to a recent survey, people normally prone to release their stress to watching movies just lying on the bed or playing the computer games. It naturally leads to deteriorating not only people's physical health problems, but
also
mental weakness.
Furthermore
,
such
these people are highly likely to get the depression. So, making a variety of sport centres or community buildings about exercising purpose is imperative for their public. Another point worth mentioning is that if there are many facilities of improving health of people, nation's economic growth would be increased in the sense that people are becoming active and enthusiastic. To explain in detail, the people spending a lot of time exercising are
most likely
Suggestion
more likely
to leave their house out and enjoy many activities so that they spend their money on the market compared with those people spending a lot of time staying at home, and purchase some apparatus of requiring their exercise. So, if the government should erect diverse theme entertainment buildings, people are becoming more outgoing and can be healed their mental diseases by connecting with members of a
sport
the activity of providing for or maintaining by supplying with money or necessities
support
group during their
work out
the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit
workout
. In conclusion, it is still disputable which is the critical way to invest the nation of revenue in groups of having different disposition. But, I am firmly convinced that the nation should pour an amount of money into the recreation building rather than teach students in that the healthy cannot alter anything.
Submitted by bibila1120 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: