IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #university #study #lack #workers #electricians #plumbers
It is true that many people prefer to pursue academic studies at university rather than to follow a vocational training course. While nobody can deny the need for university graduates, I totally agree that we should encourage more people to qualify as electricians, plumbers or other essential manual workers. There are two important reasons why more workers must be trained in skilled professions
such
 as plumbing or electrical work.
Firstly
, those workers are important when new buildings are constructed or when existing buildings have to be renovated or simply maintained. Indeed, in many countries, a permanent maintenance staff of skilled tradesmen is employed in hospitals, schools or museums, ensuring the safety of all who use the buildings.
Secondly
, in some developed countries, there is an existing imbalance in the economy, resulting in graduate unemployment, while at the same time there is a shortage of skilled labour. Governments in those countries need,
therefore
, to work with employers to ensure that extra vocational training is provided. More people must be encouraged to attend vocational training courses. The onus is on schools to incorporate relevant subjects into the curriculum, so that not all the emphasis is placed on preparing for academic study at university. Many boys and girls are not academically inclined, but
this
 does not mean that schools should consider them as failures.
For example
, workshops in schools could provide an opportunity to learn ‘hands-on skills’, adapting the theory of the physics lessons to practical applications. Parents should
also
 help their children to choose vocational careers, explaining the good employment prospects and remuneration for manual workers with qualifications and skills In conclusion, I agree that it is vital that we encourage more people to do vocational training because without
such
 skilled workers, society cannot function effectively.
Submitted by linhhap1911 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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