Some people think that some type of criminals should not go to prison, instead they should do unpaid work in the community. To what extent do you agree?
Variety
of crimes are being punished by Correct article usage
A variety
prison
, however
some people believe that certain offenders should not be imprisoned ,rather they should do community Add the comma(s)
however,
services
. I agree that in some cases, Fix the agreement mistake
service
prison
may not be the best solution and community work
will help them to rehabilitate. The first thing to consider is the
young offenders, Correct determiner usage
that
which
are Fix the agreement mistake
who
being
involved in all Unnecessary verb
apply
type
of crimes, can never be put into Fix the agreement mistake
types
the
Correct article usage
apply
prison
. This
is because the children’s mind
can be moulded easily, so before giving them harsh punishment the whole matter should be looked for. Fix the agreement mistake
minds
For instance
, several mobsters force needy kids to do illegal acts for the sake of money, which make
them delinquent juveniles. The rest of the life of the youngsters can be saved by teaching them good deeds along with Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
the
community works so that they can understand the value of their life. The second thing to be considered is that Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
drug addicted
persons, who are Add a hyphen
drug-addicted
culprit
can never be imprisoned. The reason is that they commit crimes to feed their destructive addiction, so they need a rehabilitation centre, Fix the agreement mistake
culprits
besides
of giving them a pitiless punishment in a prison
. For example
, if a drug
addicted person involves
in Wrong verb form
is involved
a
social Remove the article
apply
work
then
it would be possible for him to overcome the drug
craving. Several drug
addict persons can be able to do the work
for the welfare of their societies and it would definitely helps
in the growth of communities. In conclusion, putting criminals in Change the verb form
help
a
Correct article usage
apply
prison
is not the only way to rehabilitate the criminals. There should be a proper investigation of an offender and a crime .I strongly believe that social work
without any pay is one of the best way
to Change to a plural noun
ways
deterrent
them which benefits both society and the Replace the word
deter
offende
Correct your spelling
offender
offence
offended
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite