Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

#people #exercise #time #health

In the modern scenario, most of the workforce in a country

believe

Suggestion

believes

that the value of engaging in exercises in living a healthy life is negligible.

Moreover

, they tend to cling on to the

rumors

gossip (usually a mixture of truth and untruth) passed around by word of mouth

rumours

which suggest, alterations in diet

(

Accept space

(

adding supplements or multivitamins) have the sole power in addressing their health problems

such

as obesity. In

this

essay I am going to discuss the negative consequences of neglecting exercises and how to overcome them. On the one hand, nowadays technology

has crucially affected

Suggestion

crucially affects

crucially affected

the essential human mobility or locomotion. For an instance, almost all the companies have replaced staircases with elevators or escalators which is an easy mode of travelling to any floor of the building rather than ascending a flight of stairs!

Furthermore not

Accept comma addition

Furthermore, not

like in the past people are reluctant to go even to the nearest boutique on foot.

On the other hand

, today’s workers pay much attention to their work rather

than to their health

Suggestion

than their health

. The deadlines and schedules make them work

selflessly which

Accept comma addition

selflessly, which

leave

Suggestion

leaves

them with no time to engage in exercises.

However if

Accept comma addition

However, if

the government as well as all the companies in a country

get

Suggestion

gets

together and provide the staff members a few hours off of work, at least for a week to engage in exercises and appreciate them when they intend to do so will have a positive impact on these problems. The companies can

also

notify the workers about the aftermath of not getting proper exercises via

internet

Suggestion

the internet

or brochures on a daily basis, they will undoubtedly start acting towards gaining good health through exercises. In conclusion, there are many reasons as

such

stated above which express why the working people do not engage in exercises nowadays. If the government and private companies collaborate to come up with innovative ideas which will earn people’s trust about the major role that the exercises play in a healthy life,

this

problems

Suggestion

problem

can surely be controlled in the future.

Submitted by yash6ps on Fri Mar 06 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

324 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Time constraints
Sedentary lifestyle
Passive leisure activities
Workplace wellness programs
Active commuting
Subsidized
Public awareness
Health benefits
Incentivizing
Accessible public spaces

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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Most high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 per cent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women. To what extent do you agree?

You recently booked a part-time course at a college. You now need to cancel your booking. Write a letter to the college administrator. In your letter - say which part-time course you booked - explain why you need to cancel your booking - ask about booking a different course