IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others however, say that cooperation and teamwork and skills are more important discuss both sides and give your opinion

#people #children #school #cooperation #teamwork #skills
A group of individuals felt pupils have been trained to compete in schools. The
next
 group says, even though coordination, group activities and improving capabilities are more dominant. In my opinion, the priority has to be given to develop the abilities of a child to work together with classmates. It enhances participation. Even if they are competent
also
 they may lack all other qualities to work in partnership. Working in a team will give a chance to contact each other. Which is essential to get a finer communication skill and it
also
 helps to maintain interpersonal relationships. Children can understand the topic by discussing among each other. So achieving a task is not so difficult for them. There are some educational institutes, they make the students to be competitive enough to accomplish their goals. Here the students will lack socialization. They will do anything to get something done. It can have impacts in the behaviour of children in several ways. They only care about themselves. In conclusion, children have to be competent enough to deal with a situation.
Moreover they
Accept comma addition
Moreover, they
 must have the capacity for doing collaborative work by having close relationships.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: