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Band 4.5

The table below shows information and predictions regarding the change in percentage of the population aged 65 and above in three countries.

The table below shows information and predictions regarding the change in percentage of the population aged 65 and above in three countries.
#information #predictions #change #percentage #population #three #countries
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The table demonstrates the actual rate of the population over the age of 65 and above in Canada, Germany and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
, for the time of 1988,
2000
Correct word choice
and 2000
show examples
 and with a rough estimation of the change in data in the year 2030.
Overall
Linking Words
, by 2030, Germany has the highest
increased
Replace the word
increase
show examples
 of its senile people followed by Canada and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
. Population in those 3 countries constantly growing from 1988 until in the near future. During the past span of 1988,
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
 number of old people from the UK is exactly 14.23% and slightly rose about 0.66% in 2020,
however
Linking Words
, it was forecasted that in the breadth of
2030
Add a comma
,2030
show examples
 it will grow sharply
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 20.35%
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 average. Canada
on the other hand
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 has 16.32% in 1988 with a marked escalation
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Add an article
the number
show examples
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
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 at 20.67% and 26.35% in the term
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2000 and 2030 respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Germany
who
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 has the most senile people
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to other countries acquired 20.45% in 1988 and substantially rose by approximately 4.35% after 12 year time. It was
also
Linking Words
 believed that in the period
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2030, it will increase considerably
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 5.68%.
Submitted by dianajane.gonzaga on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage change
  • population
  • aged 65 and above
  • information
  • table
  • data
  • trends
  • patterns
  • comparison
  • predicted
  • future
  • findings
  • comment
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