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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category or exports in 2016 compared with 2015.

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category or exports in 2016 compared with 2015.
#value #country’s #exports #categories #percentage #change #category
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The bar chart indicates the
earning
Correct your spelling
earnings
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 from the exportation of five different
products
Use synonyms
 and the table compares the value changes
about
Change preposition
of
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 each
exports
Change to a singular noun
export
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 from 2015 to 2016.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 four out of five exports saw an increase
of
Change preposition
in
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 value within a
year
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the total earnings of the
year
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 2016 is more than the
year
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 2015 and petroleum
products
Use synonyms
 received the highest proportion of the total revenue. Looking at the information in more detail, we can see that the gems and jewellery had a slight decline
by
Change preposition
of
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 5.18% in one
year
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 other
products
Use synonyms
 had risen remarkably. The figures for the agricultural
products
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 show a
merely
Change the adverb
mere
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 growth
by
Change preposition
of
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 0.81%,
whereas
Linking Words
 the textiles increased significantly by 15.24%
as
Change preposition
apply
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three times higher
as
Change preposition
than
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 the petroleum
products
Use synonyms
 which accounted for 3% increments.
Also
Linking Words
, Engineered goods rose considerably by 8.5% in
one-
Add an article
a one-year
show examples
year
Use synonyms
 period.
Finally
Linking Words
, it is noticeable that the sales figures for four out of five exports have an upwards trend to that of the
products
Use synonyms
 of gems and jewellery.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words products, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • exports
  • categories
  • value
  • percentage change
  • compare
  • trends
  • changes
  • chart
  • table
  • overview
  • introduce
  • highlight
  • describe
  • summarize
  • information
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