In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence.

#today’s #world #families #parents #work #say #children #benefit #income #lack #support #parents’ #absence

this

modern world, Every person

have

Suggestion

has

to do work

Suggestion

worked

hard for fulfilling their wish and becoming financially stronger.In many

families

Accept comma addition

families, both

both

the parents work for their prospectives. Some individual opine that because of

this

reason children

Accept comma addition

reason, children

feel alone.

This

essay will

discusses

Suggestion

discuss

the arguments of

both

ends.

To begin

with, by belonging to the working

family children

Accept comma addition

family, children

have

Suggestion

has

some benefits.

Firstly

, when

both

the parents work they can

fulfill

put in effect

fulfil

their children’s needs.

Secondly

, if the parents financial condition is stronger than they

provid

give something useful or necessary to

provide

proved

provided

better education to their children by putting them best schools.

For

example today

Accept comma addition

example, today

private

school

has a more facilities than government

school but

Accept comma addition

school, but

their

fees

Suggestion

fee

charge is too expensive

Accept space

everyone can not afford it. But when their parents have enough money than they can put them in

good

Suggestion

a good school

good schools

school

Howeve

Suggestion

However

Accept space

others feel that when

both

parents are working

Accept space

children

has

Suggestion

have

no one to take care of them

Accept space

children feel less supportive. Children want to tell lots of things to their parents

such

as what they do in

school

, how the children feel many other things that children want to tell their guardian, but they

can not

cannot

share it because of

both

the parents are working.

Furthermore

, Children often feel depressed because

their

in or at that place

there

is no one to

listen

perceive (sound) via the auditory sense

hear

them. Sometime

child

Suggestion

a child

take

Suggestion

takes

unsuitable decisions while they are sad. Their parents

has

Suggestion

have

have had

no time to listen them working becomes

first

priority for them. To conclude, working is a good thing because of employment parents fulfil their Childens

wishes but

Accept comma addition

wishes, but

sometimes it will

effect

have an effect upon

affect

children’s mind

Suggestion

a child’s mind

child’s mind

when

both

parents are working.

Submitted by pritiahir74552 on Wed Mar 11 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

dual-income households
financial stability
work-life balance
emotional well-being
parental involvement
social development
extracurricular activities
childcare solutions
time management
career advancement

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In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

too much emphasis is given for education of the young. more government money should be spent to time activity of young people. to what extent do you agree or disagree

many governments think that economic progress is their most important goals.Some people,however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, some consumers are less influenced by advertising than in the past.What are the reasons?Is it a positive or negative development?