In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong while others consider it as a valuable work experience. discuss both opinions and give your opinion

In today's world, technology
such
as TV and
video
games are mainly watched and played by children.
Although
, others believe that, it harms the mental health problem of children. I partially agree with
this
statement. In today's generation, games and television are the sources to learn new things and improve
ability
Suggestion
abilities
the ability
.
Firstly
, children
develop
Suggestion
develops
their minds by playing
video
games and learn to develop skills.
Additionally
, by watching
television they
Accept comma addition
television, they
can get extra knowledge about different types of activities. They can learn more than their additional books by which they can develop their knowledge and skills.
For example
, by playing
video
games
such
as cheese they can increase
there
of them or themselves
their
intelligence.
Hence
, It is an effective way to improve the brain of children.
Although
, the habit of playing for long hours can create mental problems
on
Suggestion
in
their mind. Watching television and playing
video
games make them lazy and addicted, which gives
negative impact
Suggestion
a negative impact
on health. In different countries, these technologies had mainly effect on children's mental problems.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: