IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars
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It is argued that some criminals must do charity
work
Use synonyms
t
in the direction of
to
 serve the
community
Use synonyms
 rather than be imprisoned. I strongly believe that the punishment should fit the crime which means that
such
Linking Words
 services can be suitable for light crimes.
Use synonyms
community
Suggestion
Community
work
Use synonyms
 provides a good alternative sentencing method for people who commit petty crimes
such
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 as illegal downloading or those who steel minor objects. It gives a chance for these offenders to pay back the
community
Use synonyms
 by painting walls, cleaning streets, and planting trees.
Linking Words
Moreover
Accept comma addition
Moreover, this
this
Linking Words
 type of
unpaied
not paid
unpaid
work
Use synonyms
 help in the rehabilitation of those criminals helping them to reintegrate into the society and decreasing the
possibilty
a future prospect or potential
possibility
 of
reoffending
offending against or breaking a law or rule
offending
 once they are released. Another reason for not putting those who are accused
for
Suggestion
of
 light crimes behind bars is that they may be imprisoned with
dangrous
involving or causing danger or risk; liable to hurt or harm
dangerous
inmates which
Suggestion
inmates, which
 might
icrease
become bigger or greater in amount
increase
 their criminal ideas and lead to the development of some
dangrous
involving or causing danger or risk; liable to hurt or harm
dangerous
 networks. Take
this
Linking Words
unfortnate
not favored by fortune; marked or accompanied by or resulting in ill fortune
unfortunate
 event that happened in my country few years ago as an example, when an
adolesent
a juvenile between the onset of puberty and maturity
adolescent
 who had stolen a lady's bag was put into prison with a famous terrorist. After his release
this
Linking Words
 young boy got involved in multiple
terrorisic
a radical who employs terror as a political weapon; usually organizes with other terrorists in small cells; often uses religion as a cover for terrorist activities
terrorist
 activities led by the terrorist he was imprisoned with.
in
Suggestion
In
 conclusion, I believe that unlike brutal criminals and
reoffeners
Suggestion
, those who commit light crimes are better to be offered
community
Use synonyms
work
Use synonyms
 rather than be imprisoned.
Submitted by tasneem.mahdi.1995 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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