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Writing Samples
Band 7

some people think that they can be fit by going to the gym while others think that there is another way to remain fit. Discuss both views along with your opinion.

#people #gym
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In the present situation where the importance of teaching is increasing, it has been a debatable issue whether the role of competitive teachers for educational success is essential or not while some people believe that individual attitudes are more significant. In
this
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 essay, the issues will be examined carefully, and
then
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 I am going to give my opinion.
To begin
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 with, it is certainly true that the qualifications and compelling teaching methods help students to make a difference while teachers with poor skills and passion might harm the most important goal in studying, better grades and appropriate approaches to subjects.
For instance
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, when I was a high school student in South Korea, almost all students studied English, depending on only textbooks because, at the time, there were no teachers who can speak and communicate in English in the right ways under the compulsory education courses.
Therefore
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, the students felt an enormous amount of frustration as they had to learn everything,
such
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 as IPA symbols, the order of translations and actual conversations, from scratch again after their graduation.
On the other hand
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, some opponents disagree with the previous perception since they believe that individual efforts are more crucial for educational achievements. To be specific, the case of a renowned football player, Ji Sung Park, can be a suitable reference. Park spent his juvenile period under the outdated environment with obsolete trainers, but he could discover more effective training methods,
such
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 as writing a tactical discipline journal by many trials and errors. In the long run, he was able to join one of the best football teams in the world at the time, Manchester United F.C., later. In conclusion, it seems reasonable that individual efforts are vital for success in education, but I am personally convinced that teachers’ role is more significant because detrimental instructions can be
burdens
Suggestion
burdened
 for students' valuable time.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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