The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time.

#men #women #education #britain #three #period

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The bar graph illustrates the information about the British males and females in additional study to full-time or part-time between three decades

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be clearly seen that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

full-time study is more popular than

part time

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

education for both

men

Use synonyms

and women. It can be observed that

Change preposition

from

show examples

1970 to 1981, one million males studied full-time and 180000

men

Use synonyms

studied part-time,

whereas

Linking Words

opposite site , females approximately 800000

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

studied full-time

however

Linking Words

par-time

Correct your spelling

part-time

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studied was least that was just 150000.

In contrast

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, there was full-time a steady decrease for

men

Use synonyms

during 1980-81 that has been just above 800000,

while

Linking Words

female enrolment

was slightly risen

Change to the active voice

slightly rose

rose

show examples

in the same period. Part-time

studied

Wrong verb form

studies

show examples

almost

Add a missing verb

are almost

show examples

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

of the previous decade.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, full-time education

grown

Add the auxiliary verb

grew

has grown

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up in 1990 to 1991 which was almost touched 1100 thousand.

Change preposition

show examples

opposite

Add an article

the opposite

show examples

side, males

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

approximately 900 thousand

into

Change preposition

show examples

this

Linking Words

decade.

In addition

Linking Words

part -time

Correct your spelling

part-time

show examples

education was

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

both

Change preposition

for both

show examples

men

Use synonyms

and women that were 200000 respectively throughout the decade.

Submitted by jadejaankitsinh9574 on Tue Mar 24 2020

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Vocabulary: Replace the words men with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

162 words

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The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three period and whether they were studying full-time and part-time.

A company is going to give some money either to support the arts or to protect the environment. Which do you think the company should choose?

Government should make people responsible for looking after their own local environment. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that the legal age at which people can marry should be at least 21. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people regard work as the most important thing in life and have little interest in anything else. Other people are more enthusiastic about their hobbies and leisure interests than their jobs. discuss both these attitudes and give your opinion.

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Some people feel that the private lives of celebrities should not be openly shared by the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write at least 250 words.