IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

#people #hobby #trend
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph shows the number of car journeys into the city centre made by residents and non-residents over a ten year period. In 1996 an average of just under 10,000 journeys per day
were being made
Suggestion
was being made
 by residents, while approximately half that number
were made
Suggestion
was made
 by non-residents. Over the subsequent three years,
resident
Use synonyms
 journeys remained reasonably stable, while non-
resident
Use synonyms
 journeys increased each year, exceeding 8,000 per day in 1999. In early 2000, parking meters were introduced into the city centre, and
this
Linking Words
 had the effect of virtually halving
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 non-
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
 decreased only slightly. By the end of 2002, the number of
resident
Use synonyms
 journeys had not altered significantly, but non-
resident
Use synonyms
 journeys had risen to their 1999 level. At
this
Linking Words
 point, Westgate Street and Park Lane were pedestrianised.
This
Linking Words
 resulted in a dramatic decline in non-
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
, and a slight decrease in
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
. From
this
Linking Words
 point onward,
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
 remained more or less at the same level, while non-
resident
Use synonyms
traffic
Use synonyms
 resumed its upward trend, reaching nearly 5,000 journeys per day in 2005.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumerism
  • retail therapy
  • materialism
  • disposable income
  • economic growth
  • financial instability
  • environmental impact
  • social interaction
  • community building
  • emotional satisfaction
  • advertising influence
  • shopping habits
What to do next:
Look at other essays: