IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some parents believe that children in their leisure should be involved in educational activities. While others believe it adds too much pressure on children. Discuss both views and views and give your opinion.

#parents #children #leisure #activities #pressure
It is true that individuals prefer riding a bicycle than driving a private car in rent years. Some people support that using bikes to get to places which not only can reduce pollution but
also
 improve the health, but others hold an opposite view. In my opinion, I believe that riding bicycles are a suitable way of getting around but not the best one. It is undoubted that the use of bicycles is an effective method to eliminate air pollution
.
Accept space
.
 Vehicles that run on the road produce numerous carbon dioxide, these carbon
gases
Suggestion
gas
emission
Suggestion
emissions
 will harm the ozone layer and cause global warming. If persons are willing to choose traditional trip modes, like by bikes, which are more helpful for the protection of air qualities.
Moreover
, cycling seems like a sport and could assists individual to become healthier. In details, people who prefer to select by bicycle to get around are more easily to lose their weight and keep fit than other persons who select to driving cars. It is more important that cycling is a perfect method to reduce stress and improve sleep qualities of citizens, like other sports
.
Accept space
.
However
, using bicycles are not suitable for some situations. The old
traveling
the act of going from one place to another
travelling
 modes, like riding bicycles, are not recommendations for individuals who want to go to a long-distance destination.
For instance
, if students who live far away from their schools and use bikes to be their main transportation, they should spend a lot of time on the roads and cannot concentrate on their studies in a short time.
In addition
, bicycles are not appropriate tools for emergency situations,
such
 as someone should go to the hospital or must go somewhere immediately. In conclusion, using bicycles is good to protect our air qualities and enhance our health, but for some conditions it is not a great choice.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: