IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do advantages of this trend outweigh disadvantages?

#people #children #life #trend
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In modern society, there has been a major concern that many couples have delayed parenthood. In my opinion, I consider that par
ents de
Suggestion
parents'
parent's
cision to give birth in lat
er stage of
Suggestion
later stages
the later stage
life
Use synonyms
 can bring about more advantages for fam
ily wh
Suggestion
the family
en compared to minor drawbacks that it might bring. Despite the drawbacks mentioned below, I believe the benefits gained by the late childbirth are extremely useful for the whole family. The primary reason why a number of individual want have children later in their
life
Use synonyms
 is that
this
Linking Words
 choice all
ow th
Suggestion
allows
em to have more time to find their passion and enjoy
life
Use synonyms
 when they are young.
For instance
Linking Words
, it is easier for a young couple to travel when they do not have baby to nurture. An additional reason is that people who are at ear
ly stage of
Suggestion
an early stage
the early stage
 their career usually have lower income compare to when they are older.
Therefore
Linking Words
, many people decide to start raising a family after having accumulated enough money to ensure a better
life
Use synonyms
 for their children. Admittedly, there are some issues involved when people want to have children in their middle age.one
pr
Suggestion
One
oblem is that it has some detrimental effects on the society,
this
Linking Words
 tendency might affect family
life
Use synonyms
 as having children later will cause sig
nificant age gap be
Suggestion
a significant age gap
tween two generations.
This
Linking Words
 makes it harder for parents to understand and communicate with their offspring. Another negative aspect is that if people give birth when they are too old, the babies being born might be physically less healthy.
This
Linking Words
 might adversely affect the quality of the future workforce if too many people decide to follow
this
Linking Words
 trend. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 tourists can have certain negative effects, it has an extremely positive influence on the economy as parents prefer having children later in
life
Use synonyms
 because they want to improve their career and enjoy their social
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by atifalvi143 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • prioritization
  • financial stability
  • educational prospects
  • personal development
  • health advancements
  • fertility options
  • economic uncertainties
  • parenthood
  • societal norms
  • life experience
  • generational gap
  • upbringing
What to do next:
Look at other essays: