28. Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

#people #birth #thirties #development #support

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In the contemporary era, most females tend to secure their careers

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firstly

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first

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when they are young.

This

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contributes to the fact that they tend to marry and become mothers in their late thirties. As one of

feminists

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the feminists

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, I definitely opine that

women

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will benefit more if they start their families later.

However

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, under certain

situation

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situations

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, marrying and having babies in old

ages

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age

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also

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cause

Verb problem

have

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negative impacts

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them.

To begin

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with, it is easy for

women

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to focus on their careers and establish their financial independence if they stay single until later in their thirties.

Firstly

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, single

women

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will be more flexible and competitive in the workforce. They are as competent as males in the job setting without the restriction from

children

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Children

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may create obstacles for

women

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's careers because taking care of

children

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and doing household

cores

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chores

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all

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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will distract their attention and energy from their jobs.

Besides

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researches

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research

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show

Correct subject-verb agreement

shows

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that

women

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marrying and having a baby in their late 30s will provide better living environments for their

springs

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spring

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as compared with those in their early 20s or even younger. Obviously, more

women

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have

Correct article usage

the rights

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rights

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right

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to live

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apply

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the lifestyle that they prefer.

This

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is the result of human civilization and feminism.

However

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, giving

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apply

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birth in

late

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the late

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30s or early 40s will be a

high risk

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high-risk

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pregnancy and

increases

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increase

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the risk for mothers or babies to suffer from health conditions

such

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as high blood pressure in pregnant

women

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or Down syndrome in babies. The mortality rate of pregnant

women

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is higher when they are over 35 years old.

Moreover

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women

Use synonyms

becoming a mother in their later 30s have a tougher time to adapt their new roles than those in their early 20s. In conclusion,

due to

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feminism

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feminist

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activities, nowadays, females will have equal opportunities in the workforce.

This

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may contribute to the phenomenon that they tend to marry and give birth in their late 30s

with

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for

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the above reasons.

However

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, these

women

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will

also

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have some drawbacks for their health and their

children

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's health as well.

Therefore

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, females should choose a proper moment for themselves to start their families individually.

Submitted by busybee1693 on Sun Mar 29 2020

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task response

The essay addresses the prompt to some extent but lacks depth and critical analysis. Make sure to provide a balanced view and elaborate on the positive and negative aspects.

coherence and cohesion

The essay has an introduction and conclusion, but they need further development and clarity. The essay lacks overall coherence, and the structure of the ideas could be improved for better flow and development of arguments.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

352 words

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28. Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?

Some people think students can evaluate their teachers while others think it may have some bad effects discuss. Do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some ways. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Lack of fresh water is becoming global issue of increasing importance. What problems does this shortage cause? What measures could be taken to overcome these problems?

Nowadays, more and more people are moving from the countryside to cities, which are becoming overcrowded. What are the reasons for this movement to cities and what are the effects?

consumer are faced with increasing numbers of advertisements from competing companies. To what extent do you think are consumers influenced by advertisements? What measures can be taken to protect them?