IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent eleswhere. To what extent to you agree with this veiw?

#people #government #money #arts #eleswhere #veiw
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Arts sometimes reflect the heritage of the
country
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. While some people believe that the
government
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 can invest money in other means Rather than spending on the arts, I believe that the
government
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 must not neglect the arts and should invest partial funds in the arts and most of the amount in the transport system of the
country
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. The
government
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 should contribute a quarter percentage of its funds to save the monuments of the
country
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. Which represents the
country
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's beauty and its culture to the world.
For instance
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, if regular maintenance is performed to
such
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 kind of vintage craft work and the architecture of the buildings,
then
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 it will remain the same appearance to the public as it was before.
As a result
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, to save the iconic construction of the
country
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, the
government
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 should consider some funds into the arts.
On the other hand
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, facilities to the citizens is paramount. So the
government
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 must divert its majority of money to the transport system. Which make locals more convenient means of travelling to work or any other purpose.
For Example
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, investing more in infrastructure of the
country
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 and in the betterment of the railway sector,
such
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 as train, trams and underground will be more practical and feasible for individuals. As a consequence,
this
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 service will promote frequent travelling. In conclusion,
Although
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 investing some finance in the arts is necessary as it keeps the historical buildings maintained, But the diverting major portion of the budget should be for developing the
country
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's transportation services because it provides daily service to the citizens.
Therefore
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, the advantages to the citizen through
this
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 service outweigh any minor benefits it might bring from the arts.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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