More and more students choose to move to other countries to study their higher education. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh its disadvantages?
Nowadays, there is a contentious issue regarding whether
students
should complete their higher studies abroad and away from their home countries. In my opinion, the merits outweigh the drawbacks.
There are considerable benefits to Use synonyms
refine
Wrong verb form
refining
students
’ Use synonyms
personality
. Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
Hence
, I think that living abroad allows Linking Words
students
to interact with different cultures and learn the way to deal with numerous situations. To illustrate, my siblings have chosen to study in Germany and I can feel that their way of thinking improved compared to school time. Use synonyms
In addition
, they can learn how to be independent from their families. They would be able to organize and take care of their personal needs that Linking Words
Use synonyms
parents
used to take care of Correct pronoun usage
their parents
while
they were younger.
Linking Words
However
, there are potential drawbacks to Linking Words
students
moving to live away from their Use synonyms
parents
. The main issue is that there is a probability Use synonyms
to make
friendships that might have adverse effects on their studies. Change preposition
of making
Furthermore
, Linking Words
parents
won’t be able to track their children’s progress at college Use synonyms
and
can cause problems in the future especially if they are paying for their college fees.
In conclusion, the merits Correct word choice
which
to
Change preposition
of
students
to move study abroad outweigh the drawbacks as it can benefit to develop the student’s Use synonyms
personality
which Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
parents
had a huge impact Use synonyms
Linking Words
while
they were in school. Change preposition
on while
This
will assist the Linking Words
students
to be in a better position after going into the industrial life. Use synonyms
However
, Linking Words
parents
might face difficulty Use synonyms
to track
their children’s progress and the type of friends they will have at college. Given the Change preposition
in tracking
situation
it seems that Add a comma
situation,
students
should complete their higher studies abroad.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Provide clearer examples to support your points
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion mirror each other and represent the content of the essay fully
task achievement
Address the prompt more directly, and ensure that your ideas are comprehensive and well-developed
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite