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Band 7

In some countries, a high proportion of criminal acts are committed by teenagers. Why has this happened? What can be done to deal with this?

#countries #proportion #acts #teenagers
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Human beings have a long history of creating well structured societies, where the majority adhere to the principles of law, but some people still want to find ways to get rich quickly using illegal methods.
First
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 of all it concerns young population. In fact, it may be caused by the desire for easy profit or thrill. For people who started their lives with crimes, it would be very difficult to get a proper job or to live in society, so it is a problem that needs to be solved. In my opinion, the roots of the problem are flawed mindsets, irresponsibility and a lack of work for young and inexperienced employees. Generally, a flawed mindset is acquired due to an unfavourable background or upbringing. For a person who lives in a criminal part of the town, it would be very easy to start acting up, as well as selling drugs or doing other illegitimate activities.
However
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, it is not only a community’s impact that spoils young people, but
also
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 unemployment in the region where they are living can lead to causing in the worse way, (compared to a region with high employment) a demonstration of the worst criminal stats.
H
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owever there
Accept comma addition
However, there
is a solution! Young people should be busy doing some projects, working, or studying. Schools should try to find their interests and attempt to improve them, acquainting them with culture or sport. Government should produce new workplaces for immature people,
for example
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, internships or apprenticeships in hospitals, universities or schools. The youngsters will find an opportunity to grow and
as a result
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 the crime rates will be decreased.
In addition
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, all these actions contribute to the growth of the economy. In conclusion,
this
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 rate would be decreased if the government could undertake
such
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 simple measures.
Submitted by vinson90002 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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