IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and clean energy. The benefits of nuclear technology far outweigh the disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

#threat #weapons #world #peace #power #energy #technology
There are only few countries who have the nuclear arms and nowadays they are called superpower. They play
pivotal role
Suggestion
a pivotal role
 to keep the
world
 balanced and hold back from doing suppression to any region of the
world
. Nuclear
energy
also
 uses in producing power which is in very low cost and effective.
Although
 it has benefits, some people say that nuclear power plant should be banned.Before giving the opinion lets see the argument of both groups.
Firstly
,
Accept space
,
after the cold war some countries like
china
a communist nation that covers a vast territory in eastern Asia; the most populous country in the world
China
,
Accept space
,
France
,
Accept space
,
Germany counties produce
nuclear
Suggestion
a nuclear bomb
nuclear bombs
bomb
. North Korea and Iran try to produce
nuclear
Suggestion
a nuclear bomb
bomb
as a
result they
Accept comma addition
result, they
 are facing financial and other
imposement
 from USA and EU. Pakistan and India both have the nuclear
bomb
 for
this
 reason
this
plural of "this"
these
 two
countries despite
Accept comma addition
countries, despite
 of some conflict never join in
war
Suggestion
the war
 because they know the devastating effect of Nuclear
bomb
.Russian and America both have nuclear arms
as a
result they
Accept comma addition
result, they
 always
critic
Suggestion
criticizing
criticize
criticise
criticising
 each
other but
Accept comma addition
other, but
 dare to fight each other which is essential
for
Suggestion
to
 keep the harmony in the
world
.
In addition
 to
that about
Accept comma addition
that, about
 20% of electricity derive from nuclear
energy
 which is very
cheap
Suggestion
cheaper
 than
anyother
Suggestion
any other
 form of
energy
.
Moreover
 Nuclear
energy
 is a good source of
chemo therapy which
Accept comma addition
chemotherapy, which
chemotherapy which
 is used in cancer treatment.
On the other hand
,
Accept space
,
Critics
says
Suggestion
say
 that nuclear
energy
 is unsafe and it became life threatening for mankind.They have shown the example of Fukoshima and
cheronobil
 tragedy where thousands of people die.They
also
 say that the competition of producing nuclear weapon once
lead
Suggestion
leads
 to
third
Suggestion
a third world war
world
 war which may destroy the
world
. In my
opinion despite
Accept comma addition
opinion, despite
 of devastating uses of nuclear
energy
 every country should produce nuclear
energy
 but nuclear weapon should banned.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: