The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss causes and effects of this disturbing trends. Give your solution for the causes.

Weight is one of the factors affecting the health greatly that means a good physique will certainly go hand in hand with a good health.
However
, the figure of children at risk of obesity has grown up by about 20% in recent years, which is bothering a lot of people, especially the Westerners because overweight brings many issues. What is the main reason for gaining weight
uncontrolledly
in an uncontrolled manner
uncontrollably
?
First
of all, scientists find that an imbalanced diet including junk food or fast food could lead to chubby kids. Most of the fast food has
exceeding
Suggestion
exceeded
levels of sugar and
fats which
Accept comma addition
fats, which
are directly associated with increasing weight.
For example
, a hamburger with cheese contains about 600 calories, meanwhile a child need consume only between 1200 and 1600 calories per day, and
thus
if he hungrily devours two hamburgers and a cup of
coca
a beverage made from cocoa powder and milk and sugar; usually drunk hot
cocoa
coke
at the same time, he will get enough energy for all day! Not only excessive calorie intake, exercising irregularly is
also
a critical factor which comes to obesity, especially young children. They tend to sprawl about on the sofa, watch their
favorite
something regarded with special favor or liking
favourite
cartoons, nibble potato chips rather than attend outdoor activities
such
as playing sports or swimming. The kid may become obese with a shorter neck, a bulging stomach and even fat limbs. In conclusion, overweight is an obsession of every single person and the causes of obesity are evenly encountered.
Therefore
, a balanced diet that contains a lot of
fibers
a slender and greatly elongated substance capable of being spun into yarn
fibre
and minerals
instead
of fat should be included in daily menu; especially, taking exercises every morning about 30 minutes could control the weight considerably.
Submitted by nhkimngan8702 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • processed snacks
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • digital entertainment
  • balanced diet
  • junk food
  • diabetes
  • high blood pressure
  • heart diseases
  • low self-esteem
  • nutritious meal options
  • combat
  • educational programs
  • obesity
What to do next:
Look at other essays: