Some people think that the family is the most important influence on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with?
There is no doubt that teenage is where a child learns habits for life.
While
some argue that family plays an important role in influencing children, I believe friends
have the most impact on an individual's life.
Firstly
, young adults spend most of their day with friends
. This
is because they spent a
majority of their day in schools, extracurricular classes, and playing with Correct article usage
the
friends
. For instance
, a kid goes to school for eight hours, and adding classes and playing time, makes it up to ten hours spend
with Change the form of the verb
spent
friends
. This
results in spending only a few hours with family. All this
time, they are communicating with friends
and learning new skills. Furthermore
, teenagers learn relatively quickly compared to adults. So any behaviour by their friends
leaves a lasting influence.
Secondly
, these days, there is a huge social pressure in friend circles. In other words
, people want to be accepted in the group
. They tend to behave like the group
, regardless of the consequences. For example
, if a person smokes, the non smokers
are likely to pick up that habit. If a young adult does not align themselves with the Add a hyphen
non-smokers
group
, they face bullying,
or the danger of being kicked out of the circle. Remove the comma
apply
In addition
, in a friend circle where some students score high on an exam, the other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
also
work hard to keep up with their friends
. In contrast
, if some people in a group
perform poorly in exams, others also
looses
motivation and Verb problem
lose
scores
less.
In conclusion, with more time being spent with Fix the agreement mistake
score
friends
, and the social pressure nowadays, young adults get highly influenced by their friends
rather than family.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
You should provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay structure is well-organized, but the introduction and conclusion can be more developed and impactful.
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