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Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, teenagers are encouraged to find part-time jobs. Some think this is a good development while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

#countries #teenagers #jobs #think #development
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Youngsters in many nations are advocated to work in their free
time
Use synonyms
. While proponents
for
Suggestion
of
this
Linking Words
 notion believe that working
in
Suggestion
at
 a young
age
Use synonyms
 is a good way to gain experience, opponents think free
time
Use synonyms
 is for playing and stress relieve.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with the former opinion. On one hand, some experts hold the belief that
best investment
Suggestion
the best investment
 is the self investment; working as a part
time
Use synonyms
 during young
age
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 is one of these investments.
In other words
Linking Words
, working during childhood
enrich
Suggestion
enriches
 juveniles' knowledge and expand their awareness of their
future
Use synonyms
 world by giving them the opportunity to be learn to be dependent.
Additionally
Linking Words
, they can learn new skills which could benefit them in their
future
Use synonyms
 careers. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
, a published report in
Al Ahram Weekly newspaper
Suggestion
the Al Ahram Weekly newspaper
Al Ahram Weekly newspapers
 in Egypt showed that 40 per cent of the employees who worked in their young
age
Use synonyms
 had been hired easier than their peers.
Hence
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, teenagers working
in
Suggestion
at
such
Linking Words
 young
age
Use synonyms
has
Suggestion
have
 a positive impact on their presence and their
future
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, opponents believe that free
time
Use synonyms
 should be dedicated
for
Suggestion
to
leasure
time available for ease and relaxation
leisure
pleasure
 and entertainment; young men and women are suffering enough throughout their educational process. They consider the
leasure
of less size or importance
lesser
leisure
laser
time
Use synonyms
 as a vent for these students from their stress and should spend
this
Linking Words
time
Use synonyms
 doing things they love and admire. By doing that, they will refresh and prepare their minds for their
futher
to or at a greater extent or degree or a more advanced stage ('further' is used more often than 'farther' in this abstract sense)
further
 studies. To exemplify
this
Linking Words
, a study conducted by
Faculty
Suggestion
the Faculty
 of Arts, Cairo University found that students who spent their summer doing mesmerizing extra-curricular
acivities
any specific behavior
activities
 are more productive and ready to start their new semesters.
Therefore
Linking Words
, youngsters should not be forced to do part-
time
Use synonyms
 jobs as it might affect their mental health and
depriviate
marked by deprivation especially of the necessities of life or healthful environmental influences
deprived
 them from their lovely childhood. In conclusion, after
manifestation
Suggestion
the manifestation
 of both views, I tend to agree with those who think that the merits of working during childhood as a part
time
Use synonyms
 outweigh the demerits; teenagers in that
age
Use synonyms
 improve their knowledge and gain new skills and experience which will be beneficial for them in their
future
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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