Many people think that happiness relies on the responsibility of individuals, others think that it is affected by other factors. Discuss both views and state your opinion by using examples from your personal experience.

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The source of
happiness
is believed by many people can be gained only by individual efforts, while others perceive that other aspects
also
play significant roles. In my opinion, people can be happy with their personal achievements, yet it is
also
highly affected by some important factors. Each person can pursue
happiness
through
life
achievements. It is because of the satisfaction after passing challenges to reach higher attainments.
For example
, people can live joyfully when they can be promoted to a higher position,
such
as from
sales
Suggestion
a sales
to a manager.
This
achievement, of course, takes a long time, patience, and hardship,
hence
people might feel satisfied. Another example is completing a degree in university with the highest distinction
also
reflects hard work and perseverance throughout the years so that it becomes
happiness
in someone's
life
.
Thus individual
Accept comma addition
Thus, individual
attainment can bring
happiness
in
life
.
However
, personal achievements are affected by other elements.
First
, as a social being, human has a family who gives support and advice through hard times.
Moreover
, the presence of best friends
also
comforts people during ups and downs. Having a supportive social circle, people can be motivated and happy subconsciously to reach their destination and gain
happiness
in lives.
Therefore
, relatives and friends act as other essential factors of supporting ones. In my opinion, these two aspects are highly connected. Without having a proper social circle, people might suffer alone and impossible to be successful in achieving
life
achievements as part of a happy
life
. In conclusion, people cannot fully rely on individual efforts to attain
happiness
, but
also
need
supports
Suggestion
support
from family and best friends during the
life
process.

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • individual responsibility
  • personal mindset
  • proactive steps
  • self-improvement
  • socio-economic status
  • relationships
  • environmental conditions
  • external factors
  • positive attitude
  • pursuit of happiness
  • facilitate
  • hamper
  • proactive engagement
  • sense of achievement
  • conducive environment
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