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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Prevention is better than cure. Out of a country’s health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and prevention measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#prevention #cure #country’s #health #budget #proportion #treatment #education #measures
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In
this
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 world, many people are suffering from serious diseases
such
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 as cancer or heart diseases. So healthcare scientists and doctor advised to take regular exercise or eat healthy food.
That is
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 the reason why a government spending a large proportion of
Use synonyms
health budget
Suggestion
the health budget
 on
health
Use synonyms
 education and preventative measures
instead
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 of treatment. I completely agree with
this
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 viewpoint.
Firstly
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, I think that spending a huge amount of
money
Use synonyms
 on treatment, medicines, lad tests, doctor' fees or discovery of vaccination is not necessary. It will reduce overall medical costs and contribute to the economic development in the country.
This
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 extravagance can be easily diminished when
health
Use synonyms
 campaigns can encourage people to join the
health
Use synonyms
 teaching system in order to improve
health
Use synonyms
 to avoid preventable diseases.
For example
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, in Viet Nam, the rate of smoker increasing so the
administration
Suggestion
administrative
 appeal to join educational programs, many people won’t attack by the severe sickness. It will save a large amount of
money
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of spending on lung cancer.
Secondly
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, spending
money
Use synonyms
 on
health
Use synonyms
 education is essential. That will help the country to have healthier citizens. They will contribute greatly to economic development.
For example
Linking Words
, during the COVID 19 pandemic, Europeans did not wear masks to protect themselves lead to the death toll in Europe rapidly increasing and seriously affect the economy.
In clusion
Suggestion
Inclusion
, I think that the country and individuals can save a large amount of
money
Use synonyms
 by diverting from treatment to spending on
health
Use synonyms
 education and preventative measures. That has lots of benefits for development. In general, it will make life better.
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • preventive measures
  • health education
  • treatment
  • health budget
  • divert
  • health problems
  • awareness
  • healthy habits
  • behaviors
  • vaccinations
  • screenings
  • check-ups
  • early detection
  • burden on the healthcare system
  • resources
  • infectious diseases
  • healthcare costs
  • quality of life
  • balancing
  • wellbeing
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