The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australias share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

#show #japanese #tourists #australias #tourist #market #report #university #lecturer #information

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The provided bar

garph

Correct your spelling

graph

graphs

illustrate

Correct subject-verb agreement

illustrates

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the number of

Use synonyms

japanese

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Japanese

show examples

travellers who visited foreign countries from 1985 to 1995,

whereas

Linking Words

the line graph gives information on the market

Use synonyms

australia

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Australia

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

japan's tourism sector. It can be seen that in 1985, about 5 million people from japan travelled abroad,

whereas

Linking Words

Change the preposition

show examples

the end in 1995. the figure

triple

Wrong verb form

tripled

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and

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its

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reach

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reaches

show examples

Change preposition

apply

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15 million. During

this

Linking Words

period of

Use synonyms

japanese

Change the capitalization

Japanese

show examples

travelling

trend

Correct article usage

the trend

show examples

number slightly reduced but after

that

Add a comma

,that

show examples

Change the article

show examples

increase was observed

untill

Correct your spelling

until

1995.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, in 1985

australias

Correct your spelling

Australian

Use synonyms

remained at 2

percent

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per cent

show examples

Use synonyms

japanese

Change the capitalization

Japanese

show examples

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

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Whereas

Linking Words

Change the article

show examples

increse

Correct your spelling

increase

was observed

untill

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until

1988.

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however

owever

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However

, in 1989

this

Linking Words

percentage reduced slightly

after

Correct word choice

and after

show examples

that again

incresement

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increment

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was observed and

this

Linking Words

trend goes till 1993 and

that

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at that

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time

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Australias

show examples

australias

Correct your spelling

Australia

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was beyond 6

percent

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per cent

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and in the

Linking Words

last

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,last

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it will

became

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become

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equal to 6 in 1994 In conclusion,

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japanese

Change the capitalization

Japanese

show examples

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

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travelled abroad and in

same

Correct article usage

the same

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decade

australias

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Australias

show examples

Use synonyms

japanese

Change the capitalization

Japanese

show examples

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

show examples

they both are increased.

Submitted by reema10das on Fri Apr 10 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words japanese, share with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "reduced" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.

▼

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

166 words

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The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australias share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

Student today can access the information online so libraries are not necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Plastic bags, plastic bottles and plastic packaging are bad for the environment. What damage does plastic do the environment? What can be done by governments and individuals to solve this problem?

In this technological era, personal information is stored on computers by many companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that a new language should be invented for people from different countries to use for international communication. Do the advantages outweigh its drawbacks?